Apparently I still have the photoshop problem - but - I'll look into it the moment I can actuelly sit 'straight' for over 10 min.
My back hurts so much and I'm in so much pain that I feel I'm becoming this grumpy 'ol lady.
I was lecturing kids on a party Kevin threw with his friends, some friend of Kevin got drunk, I know because she walked to me and grabbed me saying: 'I'm drunk... teeheeeee.' I sat there sober - I drew some art in the corner going: 'HISSSS
at the music' and I can't drink because of my medical condition.
Now, I've been drunk at least ... when I was that age - ... not so much ... Being drunk is not really my gig - I drink only when it's holiday's and this year - nadda alcohol. But - ... BUT - I used to party - I used to be dropped off by my mum at a disco and she'd yell out of the window: 'HAVE FUN!
' *drives away*
I'd stand there like: 'I want to go home, but I'm to scared to walk through the dark - even though I live 5 min walking away from here'
(forest <- total wuss)
So, I remember, when I was drunk, I could not remember anyone, not their face or their name in fact nothing, my mum would come back into the club named: 'The Cartier in Schilde' and actually give me drinks that tasted 'UUUGH'
But none the less - I got drunk, but I've never remembered saying: 'I'm drunk... teeheee' (My cousin Sabrina drank once a RedBull and said: 'Oh my, I think I'm ... getting drunk' *wanted to hit her saying: 'It's AN ENERGY DRINK' but it was to amusing to watch...)
At least not so far - so this girl is complaining about a guy towards me - I notice this guy staring at me, I mention my age a little to loud, so that problem was solved - but of course that girl kept complaining. So I tell you what happened. With my sober bum and 'half' broken back - that had so many injections - pain all over my body, afraid of the noise, I got to tell you, I notice I'm getting to old if I think: 'They have to turn the music down ...'
I could feel my heart beating at the same rhythm on Gangnam Style ...
So, this girl keeps talking about this guy but I'm doing the mac-arena, the way I know it, hell I didn't knew their were other versions ... So yeah I did this with 4 people on the dance-floor, all sober and looking at Kevin: 'Kill me ...'
After a while, countdown has begun and we celebrate - got kissed by a girl I have no clue who she is, ... on the cheek.
Ok, a'ight fine ...
The other girl starts to feel sick, I'm looking at her and I'm having this grin on my face like: 'Oh, now comes the: 'I need attention.'
Her best friend starts to cry and starts to blame herself for making her drunk.
I looked what booze they drunk and laughed my a$$ off. I said, 'Come home to me, I give you 4 s€xbombs and you are down on the floor, 4 shots and you don't remember what you did that night. That's being drunk...'
The other girl becomes more in panic and the other girl that I tried to cheer up keeps 'throwing up' (nothing comes out, you know, you just go and cough ...)
I know very well, that's just a 'stage', I shake my head, I offer my seat so she can sleep up - she's just dizzy, it's to late at night.
So, her best friend keeps blaming herself and I just rudely said: 'It's her own fault.'
'*sobs* no it's mine, I told her to drink ...'
'Well and who drank it, she did, did you put the bottle on her lips? No she didn't, she's now facing the after 'party' of drinking...' I look in front of me and just plain out bursted: 'Oh Gods, Karine you are sounding like a grown up...' and I laughed
Then I noticed Kevin, the one who arranged the party is taking down the lights and all the heavy spots - Kevin has this entire set to make a party for at least 50 to 100 people. No one helped.
I get up and I start helping and cleaning up the room, told Kevin: 'you played DJ, you cooked, you decorated, you remixed music for the countdown, you put all that light up in the ... thingie and most of all, you are sick, it's 3 AM, let me help you.'
I took some of the spots and they were heavy as heck. I cleaned up on my own pace and now I'm bleeding of course - it's alright with me.
The girl who I bursted my opinion on didn't gave a smile anymore to me, but I didn't care. I had this: 'You are not getting pity out of me and neither should you towards your friend, this is life, welcome to the fun, FANTA!'
It all made me remember the times I used to party - who was really drunk and who wasn't - just to get attention.
I just softly sighed and got to bed at 5 am and had a good sleep since a long time ...
To later read a mail: 'No wonder your friends dump you.'
Well possibly, you make a point, most of my friends are younger than me - I'm an artist, that makes us (I think most can relate to that) a weirdo towards someone who has a normal income and life, or who's a 'know-it-much-better-than-you-person'
I rather have real friends than phonies, simple - ...
I noticed that a lot of people have/are using me - I wasn't born yesterday but that's why I wear the mask. I'll keep wearing it until you actually demand me to show my ugly face. I can tell you, I can be very ugly and very nasty and very mean and I'll shred you to pieces if I want too, but no... I'm to lazy to take that mask off. Plus I learned something after so many years of being back-stabbed: 'I'ts not WORTH it. No one is, look at me, my health is getting worse and worse - to the point that I'm thinking: 'Let it go, take me away from here'
I not only have CFS but also CP, Chronic Pains, it's becoming impossible for me to do things that I have to do - but none the less - I still helped Kevin while the others sat down on their lazy rears 'thinking' they are drunk. For ****'s sake, I was cleaning with so much pain in my back, I hopped Gangnam Style and I totally looked like a retard dancing on whatever-that-kind-of-music-that-was - while I should have sat down and chill - no, ... Karine is an evil b!tch that does nothing but take advantage of people. *looks* Oh really? I am, oh so I guess I'm taking advantage of the spotlight from Kevin then? *dance* get in the trunk you, ooohooooooh!!!! *sarcasm*
Praise, hmmm when did I ever wanted praise, Kevin didn't thank me for what I did, no one gives me praise for what I do - I'm used to it. Don't need it, I do not need praise for my art - I know I suck - this is artistic point of view to get better and better - this is self-critic. I accept critic - but - yeah there's a but, to a extent that you aren't making fun of me.
It happened not to long ago and I could not cope with it, first going: 'OMG I WANNA LEARN FROM UUUUU UU UUUUU SO AWESOME!!! KAWAII DESU'
few months later: 'I fallowed art-school, this sucks this sucks, this sucks and oh yeah, you suck ahahahhaaaa *manical laughter*'
... One gesture *shows middle finger*
That's all I'm gonna say about it -
It's kind of how 'Alex Agnew' says it - our community isn't the same anymore like it used to be - we have FaceBook, if we have a fight we just 'block' each other just like little kids: 'You ... are no longer my friend...'
Compared 10 years ago those guys would be in your bar and hit your teeth our. So *stomp stomp stomp like a 5 year old kid who doesn't get the toy from Toys R us* buuhooo you don't like me anymore ... Miauuuuwww ... I can't say the other word ... *click* 'U ARE NO LONGER MU FRIEND' buuu buuu (childish revenge!!!!!)
Me Gusta ...
We've turned into a bunch of pussiaauuuwwwww .... Seriously, we turned into a pile of sissies, oh well - not my problem *hands in the air*
I'm gonna turn in for the night and just don't care, WHERE'S MY CHOCOLATE!
I had a fun New Year - even though I hid myself from the sound and the 'children' Hope you guys too -
so a happy 2014 to all of you - I'm OUT!
Oh, whoever reads this and you think this is about you? Well ...