Looks like I have days that are good and days that are bad...

I guess this will be a 'Time Out' week for me.
I'll try explaining why, I suffer for almost a week now from horrible 'chest pains'

I already went to the doctor since they started almost 2 months ago but were 'iregular'
After the check up they noticed my heart skipps over a few times. Nothing to worry about.

So from time to time I had those pains.
Now the day before yesterday I had to lay an entire day (also yesterday) in bed. My body wouldn't allow anything.
I dragged myself to go outside and I came home 'out of breath' in a lot of pain and the moment I placed myself down I felt my body was under attack. Today it "seemed" less.

I woke up and decided to take a nice 'cool' shower but halfway through ... the pains came back even right now the pains are horrible.
A few people called already on my cellphone to ask what's up with me.

So I decided to write this journal.
I'm skippin' for the 3rd time my chemo because I can't aford it.

By writing this I'd like to 'press' myself on I haven't asked for donations in quite some time. Someone (and I know who) decided to attack me during a livestream moment.
I haven't drawn much the past months for almost 10 months if I'm correct.

Yes, my art looks horrible yes, I know, keep pushing it in my face, becoming 30 and I haven't achieved 0
I haven't asked donations for a long time. Yes it's there below but I'm not asking.

Oh... I should be dead by now too...

Seriously... my health isn't well... But keep doing it... Really... Keep attacking, it makes a lot of people laugh.
Maybe one day 'I'll be gone' and then those words you've said... Will hurt you back.

Honestly I don't care... I'm not whining to get donations to get my chemo's, hah - man this week I'm missing my 3rd.
I'll do it myself with working with my 'crappy artwork and my crappy textures'

So, I don't need to be famous, special or anything else for that matter.

I'll just go on my own flow...

I'm just doing it on my own ritme, being myself. If you can't handle it. Your problem...
Not mines anymore...

I guess most of you fallow me for many years that my health hasn't been the 'best' for a long time.
...

*sighs*

I start to wish for the 'end' when I read things like this how people treat one and another... You get that famous 'meme' in your head.
'I don't want to live on this planet anymore'

-S