|If I could, I'd live close to a shore - just to see dolphins play with each other... |
That would bring peace to my heart...
A small update – well you guys know what 'small' means with me.
My health is becoming 'so and so'
There days I can handle it – days (mostly) I can't – I fight against my CFS – but I learned not to fight it.
It will pay me back triple to sometimes five times worse and I need to sleep. When I'm 'healthy' for a (have to take advantage-day-moment) I can do mostly, walking, drawing and of course working.
Now I'm STILL working on Margiet's site – it's very confusing to me, I had to drop by in Gent to ask her: 'Let me change that – they are not your ferrets or are you gonna change it every day on your website?'
Meaning she has her 'own' ferrets but there other ferrets that give birth and she adds them – instead of adding them as 'visits' and I'll make an extra page for it – same goes for the males – I'm very … confused – my commissions are softly getting out of the way, I think I'm around 8 that I still have to do. First a friend of mine who's giving birth, Robert and then the normal line as agreed.
I'm exhausted – my cards are maxed out – and no, just in case someone thinks that, not because of my ferrets or buying this or that, I buy only what I need and pay off what I need to pay off.
I had a lot of doctors test again and therapy sessions – learning how to deal with what's going on.
It's not cheap – wow life's great … seriously …
So yeah for the rest of the month it's only dry bread – I have only 0.41 cents left for the rest of the month. All I can say is, I'm exhausted – I'm doing this without 'help' from anyone.
I could use some website help – but it's the images that I'm working on and the moving the ferrets...
I just slept almost two days – I'm simply said: 'exhausted'
Keep asking my doctor: 'How the hell can you have a life like this?'
So yeah – troubles – as usual.
I can not open my commission-list, not until the other onces are finished and a few of them are not 'easy' – I have to watch out with my arm 'carpel tunnel'
So yeah, if someone feels like: 'She's asking money again!' just don't – I don't see anywhere I'm asking help besides for the website, but no one can help me with that …
Now, ya'll be safe …
I'm doing my best to get through it all – I'm sorry that the notes aren't read yet – I'm just so busy – a few are asking 'how's my tumor' doing – well it's for the moment 'stable' but I'm fighting a new 'virus' lets put it that way. So I hope you all wont blame me for being 'exhausted' and … 'away'
As long as I don't have continuing headaches I should be fine – but every two months I need an entire check-up.
Going through these sessions are energy draining and I need rest – I wish I would win the lottery but I'm afraid I can not even afford a ticket …
If I would win and I'm out of debt, I'd seriously would like to help others, I read so many journals that I feel like: 'My $h!t? Doesn't come close to anyone else their problem.' I'm willing to push myself even lower – than someone else. 'Oh this one has rent problems – oh I feel so bad, I suck, I should commission them or something … ' - 'Oh and this one has boyfriend issue's that she needs money to support him so he can play games.' - I know how you feel – did it for my bro too …
So yeah, everyone has their issue's …
Sorry I can not do more – I need to find a way out.